I Am Me
Celebrating people and their passions because nobody can do it like you can.
I love that everyone has a story that is unique to them. Our journeys are all different, but we can still learn so much from one another. I am grateful that through my own journey as an actor I have had the opportunity to meet so many incredible people.
On my podcast you will get to hear their stories. This podcast is for the dreamers and the inspired. For the people who love people and are completely uninterested in living life by the status quo. Every person is unique to who they are. So look in the mirror and say it loud:
I AM ME!!!
I Am Me
I am Lauren Clayton & Stephanie Richie - Laugh, Love, and Let Go: How Two Best Friends Navigate Life's Messiness
Lauren Clayton and Stephanie Richie prove that finding your best friend in your 30s or 40s might be exactly when you need them most. Their friendship began accidentally at Bible study, blossomed through a shared essential oils business, and evolved into a social media partnership.
What makes their bond special isn't just their hilarious content or viral videos—it's the emotional safety they've created for each other. "I've never had that person that's said 'you're worthy the way you are,'" Lauren shares, fighting back tears. "I can be my full self with her." This vulnerability extends to their content, where they showcase both the joyful moments and challenging realities of motherhood and womanhood.
The conversation dives into the universal struggle of maintaining personal identity beyond being wives and mothers. They discuss setting boundaries with social media work, making space for family time, and the importance of filling your own cup first.
Their refreshing honesty about aging, body image, and the relentless pressure on women to maintain youthfulness strikes a powerful chord. This wisdom permeates their advice to worry less and embrace the present moment.
Whether you're a mother, searching for deeper friendship, or simply trying to navigate life with more authenticity, Lauren and Stephanie's conversation offers both comfort and inspiration. Follow their journey on Instagram to experience their uniquely relatable, joyful approach to life's messiness.
Lauren Clayton - @lolo_clayton
Stephanie Richie - @she.stewards
Liz Bachmann (Host) - @zilbachmann
Hey everyone, welcome back to. I Am Me. Today I'm sitting down with two wonderful women who I'm talking to for the first time today. Actually, I met them through Instagram and then we just started looking at their content. They looked at mine. I was like hey, would you want to be on my podcast? So I'm sitting down with Lauren Clayton and Stephanie Ritchie. They are best friends who create humorous and relatable and encouraging digital content around motherhood, friendship, wellness and finding balance in this crazy, messy journey we call life. I think, whether you're a mother, a friend or just a girl trying to figure it out, you'll get something out of today's episode. So, with all that said, how are you doing today, ladies?
Speaker 1:Good, great Thanks for having us For sure for sure, yeah, I'm super excited to have both of you. So I don't know you. So let's get a little information about you. One y'all are both married, correct? Not their best friends? Yeah, their best friends not married to each other. I had to explain that to my mom. I was like no, no, they're, they're friends, they're not married to each other. And then your kids. How many kids do y'all each have?
Speaker 3:I have two. One is 10. He just turned 10 and I have a seven-year-old daughter.
Speaker 2:And my son just turned 15 yesterday.
Speaker 1:Teenager, how's that going? How's that going.
Speaker 2:I mean, honestly, it's super, super hard. This year has just been super hard for me just emotionally, because he's my only and he's my best buddy, so but he's awesome, it's great.
Speaker 1:I also want to know how you two met and how long y'all have been friends.
Speaker 3:So we met in 2019, I think, through Bible study and through our church, like a home life group, kind of like at somebody's house where you go and like have a meal and like sit and chat. So we met there and then like became Facebook friends and Instagram friends and then, like we kind of didn't see each other for like a year because we got out of life group and we just life got busy. We didn't see each other. And then I saw her on Facebook one day talking about Young Living Essential Oils and I in that time of my life had been going through a lot of health issues and so I bought some stuff from her. And then I was like okay, like so I bought some stuff from her. And then I was like okay, like let me be more curious about the business side, and went to her house, asked a bunch of questions, started selling with her and then, through our business, running it together, I like we just became best friends. I don't know, that's all I can think of to describe it.
Speaker 2:I mean it's super cool because we it just was organically made and I feel like it's super different to be able to find a best friend in your late 30s, early 40s, because we had an established circle, but it's very refreshing for sure.
Speaker 1:So you both create a lot of content together, as well as y'all create digital content individually. The two of you y'all use social media like in a positive light. That's content's very encouraging and relatable. So what, I guess, prompted you to start creating this content?
Speaker 2:online.
Speaker 1:Honestly, I feel like it was somewhat accidental.
Speaker 2:We love to have fun together and we had an idea. It was, I remember the very first one, honestly the first you do that we made together that went viral. Oh, that kind of sparked our interest because it hit over like 20 something million views.
Speaker 1:Oh, wow.
Speaker 2:We started getting follows and comments on it. We're like this could be a thing, like people and we play well off of each other. And so after that they we're like let's just do this to have fun, never really putting any pressure on ourselves. Granted, there can be some like oh my gosh, now we have to feel like we have to like post all the time, become somewhat a job, but it's been fun and we get so many compliments about us being so many and it's like a laugh of like okay, you guys haven't posted Where's your best friend, Like if I'm out somewhere, where's Lauren?
Speaker 2:I'm like man, people do think that we are like a test of the hip, so it's been a fun journey.
Speaker 1:I agree. Do y'all have sisters? I do, I'm an old child. There is essentially what you two are for each other, but I think it's so special that you have found, like you said, that friendship in life, because friendship is so important, and I think, especially you two, from what I can tell, because, also, like social media, we you know, we hear it's a highlight reel and I know that y'all have life outside of this, but from what I can tell, y'all seem to have a good balance of having life outside of being a mother and being a wife. How do you keep your own identity separate from those? Because, obviously, being a wife, being a mom, is part of your journey in your life, but I think it's just so important for you to also pursue your own dreams, your own passions, and you two both seem to do that. So how do y do y'all do that Like?
Speaker 3:it's not just happened there.
Speaker 3:At the beginning of us kind of doing our businesses together, I I personally struggled quite a bit with balancing life and work, which this is work for me, you know, being on social media and talking about what I love with products and young living and things, and I I would text Stephanie, call Stephanie like really kind of upset and crying.
Speaker 3:Like you know, andrew, my husband is starting to like feel like I'm not around, like I'm on my phone a lot and she had to say, like Lauren, you have to be able to balance things, like you have to give yourself like outs of time. So like, really for me now, when my kids get home in the afternoon, like I don't really share. I might share a story here and there on on Instagram, but posting reels and things Stephanie and I have kind of down to a science now like we post if we share together, we share at the same time of the night, like basically it's after my kids go to bed, so like, and we prep ahead of time, so like I prep things while the kids are gone and so things are ready, so that when I'm at a ball game like last night and I shared my reel last night I was at the ball game and it was ready like I already had it prepared. So it's more about like being organized, and Stephanie is like the queen of organization, and so she's kept me more on test.
Speaker 2:I also think too. It's like in Laura I even though we're very similar, we're also very different, which I really works well for our friendship?
Speaker 2:yeah, but for me, as far as separating it, I also think it has to do with, like, the time that I was born. I'm 42 and I grew up without media. I didn't have a phone until I was a junior in high school and I didn't have social media until I don't even, I guess, when it came in College. And so I still have that balance because I know that I lived without it and I know the fruit that it comes with being able to disconnect and be on your own, and also it's not selfish to take care of yourself. I'm a very I'm very good at self-care and I know that term is thrown out there so loosely but I feel like it's very important to fill our cup first and then in order. If I can fill my cup up first, I'm a very good friend, I'm a good mom.
Speaker 3:Not to say that it's always easy I don't ever want to portray that it's easy, but sometimes it does come across as that to others but I think it is important to be able to just live life in a good balance and not have your eggs in one little basket, you know and as far as, like you saying, you all make it seem like so you know, you all, your all's friendship is it is really this positive, like our friendship, like it's this when we're texting like we, I can maybe think of one argument, maybe like one or two in our life, you know, I don't know, just like a little bickering, you know, but we're on it.
Speaker 3:We can be honest with each other without the like oh, she's going to be pissed at me for days, you know. Like she's not going to do that to me, like if she's mad at me, she'll be like I'm mad at you or I wish you would have done that or whatever, and we move on. But like it really is like this, like what you see on real, on Instagram and the way we dance and act, like that is literally how we are.
Speaker 3:Yeah, maybe even more to the extreme.
Speaker 1:Probably. I think that's why people probably gravitate towards the both of you, because you know, I mean, that's what we do, right, that's. Nobody is on imperfect all the time. We're goofy and we're silly and humans are so multi-faceted. And then I think also it's like Lauren, you're in your 30s, correct? Steph, you're in your 40s, is that right? And it's like just because you're aging doesn't mean the fun and the lightness and exactly, and the, the little girl essentially that you know, like that doesn't go away just because you're a mom or you're a wife or you're not 20 or 15 anymore.
Speaker 3:And I think y'all embrace that really well, we've always talked about how we wish we would have met each other a lot sooner in life, but it is what it is. We've met each other. Now. It's weird to have found my best friend in my 30s, because I really struggled with friends that I know Stephanie did too all through our life and it brought us to the point where, like she gets me, I get her, like we finally find that person that's like I can be my full self, I don't have to pretend to be anybody different and she loves me for who I am. And like. That's's rare to find, especially, even, you know, a lot of people find that in their high school days and I, you know, I just did it.
Speaker 1:I think that's. I think that's an important thing to talk about, though, because friendships hard, and I and I know there are people who had their high school best friend and they're still friends into their thirties, forties, fifties, whatever. And that's awesome's awesome, but fringe like for me, some of my closer friends have come in my later 20s and I don't have a ton of friends like I have a lot of acquaintances, but like really forming and having a close friendship, it is a huge commitment. It's a relationship like any other that you have to invest in. So I think talking about finding your friend, like your close friends later in life, like that can still happen, like you don't, just because sometimes you'll see content, I would say online, you'll see people who are like they've been best friends since they were kids and they're still hanging out to this day, and not everybody has that.
Speaker 3:I had. I had a reel that I shared recently in last couple months, of Stephanie and me and it hit the biggest views that I've ever received, which was about 33 million views on that reel and and so many people commented to me and said, like how they've they resonated with that because they've had their best friend for years. Like I've had women say, like we've been best friends since we were seven. I'm like like that's amazing, like I do wish that we would have met, but I also wonder, like I was a very different person back then than I am now and I'm not sure Stephanie and Lauren would have maybe been as good of friends back then.
Speaker 3:Because I feel like our experiences kind of change us as people and because of the way I experienced things, like I became a person who, like I don't want to take crap anymore Cause I did that all through the years Like a lot of crap. Are you a people pleaser? Do a people pleaser Friendships? I used to be yeah, and Stephanie and I are pretty tough women. Now, like we both like don't, don't take crap. Like we're not bitches but we're like very. Like we're sweet, but like don't piss us off because, like I will stand up for myself and so will she.
Speaker 2:Like if somebody messes with us in public, it's going down, like it just isn't gonna, it's not enough and I think it's also just we are tactful and we we are competent and we are strong personality in a good way, like, like Lauren said, and I do believe that what we have gone through in our younger years really made us who we are and got in the time that we were supposed to be friends. At this moment and I mean, I am a different person than what I was and I feel like a lot of people. Anyway, I feel like everybody changes as a person as you grow. You hope so.
Speaker 1:Yes, I was going to ask you how it's easier to be confident when you have someone in your corner. So how has your friendship helped boost your confidence and help you want to stand up for yourself, because it's harder when, like, that's just you and you're questioning stuff. And then when you kind of start seeing someone's, like hey, she really sticks up for herself, she owns her power, I can do that too. How has that like helped? Y'all's friendship helped increase your confidence in your own stuff, in your own morals, in your own beliefs? Well, you have somebody to go to.
Speaker 2:I mean, just like you said, you have somebody to go to, you have somebody. We have a lot of the same beliefs. We somewhat we don't have the same lifestyle, but we believe in a lot of the same things and we know that that person, like Lauren, is always going to be there if I need to talk to her, and the other way around. And I do believe that you know we bring out the best in each other. If we're ever down or whatever, you really encourage the other person. Like you are worthy and like this is something that, like you, really need to pay attention to. Like Lauren and I've had conversations like this before I'm like, okay, friend, why are you being so hard on yourselves? Don't, don't do that. Say that like you and I think it helps. It helps both of our personalities. It helps, um, just us continue to grow in our faith and as people and as wives and, as you know, everything else, I agree.
Speaker 3:I feel like she's probably boasting my confidence more than the other way around. Stephanie is a very confident person. Even the day I met her she was very confident. But I definitely have grown in my confidence to be able to put myself on social media and I can say Stephanie was a big part of that because she encouraged me and she told me. She literally was like you are amazing at your job, you're amazing at this business.
Speaker 3:Like cause I really doubted myself at the beginning and to say, okay, we're going to do this Instagram thing together and we're going to like grow together. And I really really struggled with it along the way because I don't feel, like what do I have to offer? Like, what am I going to offer anybody on this platform? But she is like my person. That's like, dude, you're doing it, you're doing a great job like.
Speaker 3:She's always encouraged me and I've never really had that like I have I'm gonna cry. I've never had that person that's like said, like you're worthy the way you are, you don't have to be anybody else, because I have struggled with friendships all through my life and I'm not getting into all that on this podcast, but it is true and I feel like God does put people in your life at certain times in your life for a reason, and when I was going through all my health stuff like it was right after I got through it all, I wish Stephanie had been there through when I was going through it, but I'm grateful that she was put in my life in the timeline that she was because I needed to focus on something else besides my health and she helped get me through that.
Speaker 1:What's funny is on. So my last episode was with two women who they're actors, but they created a business together and are really close friends. That was the first time I think I had two people on and y'all are following it up with another two people, which is fun, but they were talking about how they're like you want to build a backbone. You want to learn to like stand in your power and not give a crap what people say they're like. Start consistently posting stuff on social media because, for even though you'll have positive people who support you, who relate to you, there's always going to be people who are just negative and have post something mean we've had that.
Speaker 3:That's when you know you've arrived in instagram. When you get that, I was stephanie can tell you her story. But I posted a reel about my kids winning a fish at the carnival and I got bashed because of the what I like the container that I put this fish in, which was it was fish bowl, like it was legit. And I got put on a fish hater Facebook group somehow because all of a sudden my Instagram starts blowing up with all these comments from all these fish people. I'm like how am I being found on from all these fish like fish lovers? And somebody finally told me you were posted on fish hater facebook group. I was like mortified. I took it down because I was like getting told that I was a bad mom and like all these things and you grow as a person.
Speaker 2:For sure you have to have tough skin, especially if you're gonna put yourself out there on social and you just have to know that those comments don't mean anything.
Speaker 2:Actually, I'd rather people start arguing in in the comment because that's going to give me engagement. My, the one that I had the most hate on was my. It hit 56 million and it was basically me at the pantry with the audio and just saying something like healthy me wanted a snack at the grocery store, but fat me didn't, and so the word fat was a trigger not to say that I was calling anybody fat, but it was like my inner child just saying you know, we've all been there.
Speaker 2:It's like you wish you had chips at home but you didn't buy them or whatever, and so people were bashing me, basically telling me that I'm the reason why people had to eat. You're what's wrong with yeah, and I'm like man. And so it went back and forth, back and forth, and so I would reply to a couple. I'm like thank you so much for the engagement. I really appreciate it.
Speaker 1:I actually saw that real. That one, I think, was before I saw that real, before I followed you guys, oh really, and I thought it was hilarious. Yeah, I was fat.
Speaker 1:Okay, I love people who are like I'm fat and they're like I didn't say I wasn't pretty, like you're the one who just added like a negative connotation to the word cat and I was gonna tell you too when I was a kid I was at a carnival and found out like all I had to do was get like a ping pong ball in the little like yeah that's what we did. Yeah, the million fish bowls to get a fish and my mom had like turned us loose at this carnival. I came back with like five fish oh my god she was.
Speaker 1:She was like no, no, it's like, bro, I'm getting so many pets right now like, and I like strut up with my like bags of goldfish, and my mom was like, absolutely not take this back, like I don't know where they came from, but no, that was funny that I feel like everybody, every mom. I was the kid in the story.
Speaker 3:But like nobody wants that many fish and like I didn't even want the fish in the first place, I really blame my husband more than anybody because he like encouraged it so much, but that fish did die.
Speaker 1:I will not well, most of them are sick, mine, I got to keep one. I got to keep one. I'm sorry, but if you put a hundred fish in individual, right they're not.
Speaker 3:You still gave them a better life than living in that cooler full of fish.
Speaker 2:You're bashing her for getting a fish and making it live in a better life than living in that cooler full of fish. You're bashing her for getting a fish and making it live in a better life, but these things were in plastic bags people will do anything on it, say anything on instagram and go back and forth my mom.
Speaker 1:She was cracking up. I know we're like completely off topic, but my mom she was cracking up too. She's like you got this free fish. We laugh about it now, but then we had to go and spend like 80 bucks at the pet store.
Speaker 3:Yes, that's exactly what we did and we still have. We went through eight fish before we finally kept one alive. You're gonna. So after that fish died, my husband went out and bought, like all these different other fish, and ended up now we have a beta, beta fish whatever their things are called.
Speaker 3:And we've had that thing for like nine or ten months and today he's going back to the store and getting another fish tank for my daughter's war out. This is not I and I have nothing to do with it. I said I will not clean it. I'm not, I'm not. I have two dogs. I'm not taking care of fish. So he knows he doesn't even ask me. I love my dogs, my dog. I love my dog more than most of the people that live here that's fair enough so that's fair I was gonna.
Speaker 1:So that's actually a good segue because, like fish and pets and all the stuff around being a mom, there's eight million billion opinions on motherhood and how to do it right and people who don't have kids and people who do have kids, and whether you're buying healthy snacks or if you want some chips in your pantry, whatever. How do y'all deal with that? Like, I mean, there's no manual on how to be a mother but, like you have your gut instincts. How do you deal with just all the because now we live in this information?
Speaker 2:age too where everybody?
Speaker 2:it's different, especially with from when and I'm sure Lauren can say this when my son was born 15 years ago, to now. There's so much more information. I'm, and everyone's, different and I feel like never give any like unsolicited advice to a, a soon-to-be mom or soon-to-be parent, because they need to experience their own situations themselves. You know, when I was pregnant, we I had so many opinions coming at me. It honestly never affected me. I'm very firm and like what my beliefs are and I it.
Speaker 2:It did get to me at some point, but when I was pregnant, when you can have another one like whoa now I still have this one in my belly and you would get comments about why do you only have one kid? Why does it matter? Is it affecting you any? No, it's just, it is what it is. And so like people will always throw their opinions because and here's the thing, and I get it because they think that their way is the only way, or they were taught in a certain way and it might've worked for them and it might. It's not always in a hateful way, but I will say it is very overwhelming for a mom to mom. I think that you know, lauren, and I talk about. You know, it's hard for me in the teenage years now, but I think it's just more so being there for that person and giving ideas in a way that like hey, have you tried this instead of you need to do this? You know what I mean. Yeah, there's always those kind of comments and I could go off on a topic, but I don't even want to put it on here.
Speaker 3:I also really try on social media to not only show the good moments, because and I've been told like, thank you for sharing the bad sometimes because, like I see so many people on Instagram that just share the perfect thing and say the perfect thing and make it seem like they're the perfect mom and do the perfect, make the perfect move all the time, and I'm like that is not reality and you're making a lot of people feel bad, like I'm just being honest, like there's no way that you're that calm and collected and say the most perfect things to your kid all the time. We're not perfect. We're so imperfect it's not even funny. So I'm not going to sit there and show my kid like throwing a fit on the floor and me like yelling at them, but I will say like dude, it's been a hard day, like I'm not gonna lie, my daughter was acting a fool, like whatever, like I'm very honest on social media because I don't want my followers or anybody that sees my content to be like oh, you're like that perfect. I don't want to follow you because you, I can't relate to you. This is all about being relatable and no one's perfect. No one has it all together.
Speaker 3:I'm a very impatient mom and that is my fault, like my.
Speaker 3:My downfall, I guess, is I don't have a lot of patience and so I get especially with having the two that are so close in age that fight a lot. I think that's what drives me up a wall the most is the fighting, and so I lose my mind sometimes, you know, and so Stephanie is my outlet because I sometimes don't know what else to do. But as far as like everyday mommy and like my husband, I are a great team. I literally, literally could not do this life of parenting without him. Like he takes on a lot, he works from home and helps take kids to school, like today he knew I had this, so he took them to school, and so I I'm very grateful and thankful for having a partner that when he can, is there and will step in. When I can't, because it's really hard to do, I feel for the moms that are single moms and have no body, because they're trying to work and take care of a household and take care of kids and like those are superheroes, true superheroes yeah, I.
Speaker 1:So I look I nannied full-time. I am not claiming to be a parent at all. I always preface that I but I love kids. Kids are hard and you, they have great days, but I think it's like people don't a lot of times don't think of kids as like they're just like us. They, they are people too. They have the range of emotions they have bad days, they have that. You know, like I don't wake up every day happy and so you can, like I could show up, being like it's going to be a great day, and then he is teething, or he was you, you know, and and it was just like we gave in and we watched Elmo because I, that was the only thing that calmed him. And you know, I think it's just insane that people just don't think of that.
Speaker 1:And your kids are just not little perfect people, no matter how hard you try they're little people with their own personalities, their own emotions, all that stuff that you're trying to balance, and you have all that stuff going on inside of you too Well, so I think it's very interesting. Just, I don't like honestly. I'm like can we all just like give each other a break and recognize? Recognize, like for the most part, we're just trying to do the best we can with the tools that we have and the kids that are in school.
Speaker 3:Now, like I sub at my kids school and I see how much they do, even the little kindergartners like they are working the whole time, like they don't get. They get a 30 minute recess and that's it. Everything is like paper Do this, do that, do that, do that, and then when they get home, then I used to have a lot of. I didn't appreciate what all my kids did at school before I subbed, because they would get home from school and I'd be like, ok, now you need to like eat a snack, and then you've got to do your homework, and then you need to do this chore, and then you've got practice tonight and my daughter would just melt, like literally melt, and I'm like what is your deal? And now, after subbing, I realize how much they do, and so, like this, this whole week we've had 7 30 PM game.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow.
Speaker 3:My kids play baseball and softball and so we haven't even been getting in them in the bed until 10 o'clock at night. So I did something that I've never done today and I let my kids sleep in and they were late to school because I'm like my daughter is melting, like last night I was watching, we were watching my son play baseball and she's laying in her chair falling asleep and I feel bad, but like I want to watch him play and like I want to be there to support him, and it's just hard when you've got both sides.
Speaker 3:She's only seven, so I let her sleep in and she was 30 minutes late to school and I'm like, is it going to hurt her? Like I would rather her be in a good mood.
Speaker 2:I took Bo out of school early yesterday and I think sometimes we just get so wrapped up in schedule schedule, schedule time, time that they get overstimulated. They need rest just as much as we do. And when they are overstimulated, that's when you know arguments happen, or they're frustrated and they don't know how to communicate the way that we know how to communicate, and then that's when all this melts.
Speaker 2:but like warren said like I think that's awesome that you let them sleep in. Yeah, it's not gonna ruin their life if you take them out of school today, if you, whatever, and those are going to be the memory that you're going to have. Remember when you let me sleep in like it's not.
Speaker 3:Uh, they're in middle school not in first, yeah, not in first grade.
Speaker 1:Well, it's also, it's also just recognizing that. You know, say you work all day and then you had to go to an event or do something that evening, which you do. Do that because you're mom, so you do work all day, and then you take care of your kids and you go to baseball games and all that. It's like that's taking a toll on you. You're getting tired. And then they've had just as long of a day Maybe different, but just as long of a day. They've been up since 6, 7, whatever time they get up for school in the morning had a full day of school and then they haven't stopped all day.
Speaker 1:No, and I just think a lot of times we just don't realize that we're just like, why are you not on? Why are you not a happy kid? You know, I get so annoyed when I work with some older people. I, because I have a part-time job also and the I'm 28 and they'll they'll say, oh, you're so young, why are you tired and'm like? Because I'm a human. I, yeah, I have human all day long Like I'm exhausted.
Speaker 2:I have not stopped this week, like you know I, though, like if you, if you've ever traveled out of the country, and I always use this as an example. So, spain, I went to Spain, and I don't want to say lived there, but I was there for three weeks after my senior year, graduation. I spent that time with my grandfather who lived over there, and the way of life there is completely different than the way of life here. They put an emphasis on family, not to say that we don't, but they put an emphasis on rest and family, exercise, sunlight and not strict schedules. They close down the day. All the places close down for about two hours. Schools get let out, businesses get let out, they go home and spend time with their family, and then they resume their activities. And it shows, and everybody, I'm like, are you all really this happy Like? Is everybody really this happy Like?
Speaker 2:We're all so stressed over here in the United States. I love my country, but I'm just saying like we're always impatient. Now, now, now, quick, quick, quick. And it makes us like over, overstimulated, so much where we're just like, oh my gosh, I just and we don't rest enough. Think of how many times and I'm going on a rant how like, go for it, my husband works 48 to 50 hours a week to support our family, and that's hard, and then just to retire at the age of 60 or 70, like I don't know, and finally rest, finally rest. Like it's crazy to me.
Speaker 1:No, I completely, 100% agree with you, and I think it's mind blowing to me how many times I will have an afternoon that's available and I can feel like I've been up since 5 am and my body is so tired and I feel so guilty with the notion of me going to lay down and take a one hour, two hour nap.
Speaker 1:I'm like, I'm like'm like, no, just pound some more coffee or grab an energy drink, and I'm like dude your heart. But it's like. It's insane to me that there's just this guilt that if we're not always going and we're, or you get to the end of your day and it's, you know, seven, eight o'clock and you just want to sit down and relax, sometimes there's even guilt with that. Well, I didn't get this done today. Do that either.
Speaker 3:That's, yeah, that's the both of us. If we don't have a sport in the evening, we're all laying down by 8, 8.30.
Speaker 1:But like that's, good.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's not always possible. And I feel for the people that do have to work like outside the home and eight to five job and then come home to kids and homework and dinner and all that and then, like, get their household done. I'm like how did.
Speaker 2:how did we do it, though, because we used to do it, I know.
Speaker 3:I don't know. I can't remember, like, before I finally got to quit because I used to do so Stephanie and I both did have full time jobs at one point. Because I used to do so, stephanie and I both did have full-time jobs at one point I used to do accounting for a living. I was a tax accountant for several years before my kids got kind of more in the picture. My youngest was born and that's when I finally quit. But I had two kids at one point and trying to work full-time and I'm like how do I do this? Like it was hard, but I think it's even harder as they get older because they're doing more things. They're in after school activities and sports and that kind of stuff and that hangs up a lot of your evenings too. We're very sport family Stephanie and I are, so we're kind of on the go with sports a lot. But yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I not not a mom, but I grew up playing sports, so it was like my evenings and weekends were packed with soccer.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we literally leave tomorrow, we get to rest today. We've had four games this week. We get to rest today and then we leave out of town tomorrow for two nights for a tournament baseball tournament.
Speaker 1:Yep, we had that, mine was soccer, but same thing all weekend would be gone playing multiple games I mean it's fun and like it's memories that I'll have forever.
Speaker 3:I know I'll remember all this, but by yesterday I looked like I felt like I was rough yesterday.
Speaker 1:Well, I showered for this. So no, I appreciate it. I appreciate it. I mean, you didn't have to.
Speaker 3:We can't smell you or anything, we're all in our own spaces no but my hair, my hair looked like I'd been in the rain for 18 hours Stepping back from being a mom, but just being a woman.
Speaker 1:Comparison. I want to come back to that. How do y'all deal with? Because?
Speaker 1:on top of like being a mom. There's so much just being a girl. It's just hard, and how we take care of ourselves, how we look, you know. And then y'all are in your 30s and 40s and I'm not saying you're old, I'm about to be 30, so, and then, like a year, so no shade or tea. I recognize that I'm getting older. I am just saying with that, I'm like okay, you were aging, our skin is not looking like it did at 18, you know. So how do you deal with that too? Just aging and the comparison of that especially, I think what you touched on, steph, in our country it's different.
Speaker 1:how, like we're not expected to age in America as women, my issue.
Speaker 2:I don't necessarily have comparison to other women right now, but I have in the past and again I think it shifts as you get older. You just get more comfortable in your skin. What I'm having a hard time right now is aging in general, just my skin changing, my body changing, just aging in general. That is a fear of mine which I know that I don't want. The other like. I would rather be here and age, but that is probably the hardest thing. Ever since I started getting into my 40s. This has probably been the hardest year for me. I just am realizing. I look back at pictures like, oh my gosh, and I know like I'm confident with myself, I feel like I'm a pretty person, but I also feel like I mourn the person that I looked like when I was in my twenties. My skin was tighter, I looked younger and I feel like there is a big pressure now. Now with everybody you know and I go get facials, I get that stuff done, but there's a pressure with women to always look 20.
Speaker 2:Like always look 20 to have a certain body type, but nothing is ever perfect. I want to read something to you that I sent to Lauren yesterday, and this was actually in relation to aging, and it says imagine being in your 80s and you catch yourself thinking about your life, how you never took that trip to go swimming in the ocean on a beautiful summer day because you didn't like the way you looked in your swimsuit, realizing you never laughed until you couldn't breathe because your teeth weren't straight enough. And it basically went on and on and on talking about the things that we don't do because of our image, because of the things that we don't want to focus on, and I feel like that is just taking so much joy and time away from our current moment because we're so worried about certain things as women, and I fall in that trap. I fall in like, oh bad, yeah, I don't want to be seen. Or in my face, I don't want to be seen, whatever, I don't know.
Speaker 2:I feel like it's hard, and especially now, young girls and I don't have a girl, but Lauren and I talk because she does, I have a girl. Yeah, it is scary right now with the way social media is, because there's access to information, there's access to image, and now every young girl, even boy, they have peers and they want whatever like the next shiny thing is. And we fall into that trap and I thought to them like man, if I didn't have social media? What if we did it? What if we didn't have social media? It would be like I grew up and everybody would be a little bit happier because you're not paying attention to the person on the other side of the screen, on everything that they have, that you don't you know Well, I almost canceled this podcast because of this cold sore.
Speaker 3:So like I get it, like we get into our image now I will say I think I'm okay in my aging process right now because I'm not really aging that much yet but I'm only in my mid-30s. I know it's coming like I move a little slower up the stairs maybe, but like with my joints and stuff, but like that's in my back might go out every once in a while, but as far as like my skin and stuff, honestly I'm just gonna say this a lot of it has to do with Young Living products for me. I do and I'm just throwing that out there not as an advertisement but as a like for real like it is reverse aging me, like I feel like I look better in my 30s than I did in my 20s, especially on my face and my skin, with using better products. So that is, that is the aging side of it for me. But I do have a lot of moments where I feel insecure with my body, just like you know things. You know fat hanging in places that I wish wasn't kind of thing.
Speaker 3:And I'm trying and I do the best that I can for the lifestyle that I have. I mean, it's hard to do. You can't do everything. It's hard to I struggle to try to fit everything in a day and like, even with my kids being gone for six hours, you think, gosh, you should have every, your house should be perfect.
Speaker 3:No, like it is like I do have a job, I do the young, I do this business and I do sub-sum and then, like you try, it takes time to like do the dishes and do the laundry and like, then you work and you do other things and it's like, well, that's three o'clock, like the kids are going to be home in 30 minutes, you know. So it's like I I try to prioritize working out and that's something that Stephanie and I talked a lot about, because she does do a very good job of prioritizing exercise and I have been trying to do better and and eating better and things like that. But it does catch up to you, I will say, with aging, like you can't eat the same without it affecting your body. My goodness, you eat a little french fry and suddenly there's some more love handles all of a sudden. So yeah, I agree with you.
Speaker 1:I've become like, so like I I'm aware that, like my skin, especially in my forehead, and like in between here I'm like that's not looking the same which I did when I was turned 26 I started getting I am on my skincare routine like I don't skip mornings and I don't skip evenings, like, and I'm all about sunscreen, but it's just crazy, like how it changes. One thing you mentioned, steph, was your. You have a son, but I think even you're, with social media and all that, you're seeing teenage boys and younger boys. They care a lot more about appearance, in my, my opinion, than they used to.
Speaker 2:I didn't know that I actually had a teenage daughter Like, like, why are you focusing so much on your hair? But it is a thing and he doesn't have. He has Snapchat, but that that's it, and it's highly monitored. But other than that, he doesn't have Facebook, he doesn't have Instagram, he doesn't have TikTok, nothing. But it is in person that he is seeing. I said, honey, like you're gonna start looking like everybody else with the, and it's not to where his hair is, where he wants it. Now he's currently in a grow out phase, but he uses my hair diffuser in the morning, he puts a gel in it and he's caught.
Speaker 2:Well, imagine if he had social media this hair is a thing, and it's not just him, it's literally a yes. I don't understand.
Speaker 3:I'm terrified.
Speaker 2:I'm terrified to have I mean, it's not, it's his hair. He can wear the weight, yeah, and we get it cut the way he wants and like I can't control that, even though it's not my favorite thing, he looks better when it's like clean cut on the sides.
Speaker 1:I'm like, if you want to look like you got a toupee on your head, go for it. Yeah, I just I agree, though I think like that's something.
Speaker 3:I've noticed a lot that like boys they do all the boys like, especially like in baseball and stuff. I've noticed like the baseball teams, like all the kids have these. Well, and in Lucas's age the thing is like um mullets yeah like mullets and perms, perms and a mullet yeah, kids with perms in the back in their mullet. I'm like you realize you're gonna grow up one day and think you look stupid right.
Speaker 2:Also what we did, though, when we were younger. What was our thing, I don't know.
Speaker 3:In high school, we had the boys had frosted tips like highlight whenever.
Speaker 1:I was growing up.
Speaker 3:I mean we all did it. We all had phases where we wanted to fit in and we bought the shoes or the shirts or whatever. So we can't like say, like my right now even my third grader, he wants Jordans because kids at school wear them you know, yeah. I'm buying. I mean, I didn't buy them. My mother-in-law did like $200 pair of shoes for a third grader right and you're like, only wear these for special occasions seriously, yeah, seriously.
Speaker 3:But my daughter is the one who I'm terrified. I told Stephanie I'm like you're gonna have to help me raise her, like in all honesty, because I'm already struggling with her big time, with emotions and her clothes, and she's seven, oh god she's not seven, she's 18.
Speaker 3:She's 17. Yeah, she's definitely older, and that's the thing is. She's been on social media with me since she was three, because I've been doing this since she was that old, and so she will a lot of times be on there with me and I not that she's like sitting there scrolling, she's just on the videos and stuff sometimes. But I try not to be super into my own appearance. Like you know, I have messy hair days and things like that, and I'll go to ball games looking like crap and she's like you're going out looking like that and I'm like, yes, ma'am, I am like she just cares too much and she'll like go back and change her clothes after I already picked out her clothes well, I think also, even if she didn't have any idea social media, like what social media was or anything, you still are going to school with kids who are you know, there's a lot of parents have different rules and restrictions on that.
Speaker 1:Some Some kids are on social media, have their own social media.
Speaker 3:Oh, you would be blown away to see the number of kids and like the younger ages having cell phones and stuff. Like there are some first and second graders that have cell phones. I'm like you have to know, you don't even know. Like you know how to work it. Yes, but like you like actually it's funny. You said that because yesterday my daughter was watching something on TV and it said something about can you imagine not having social media? And she goes oh, that would be terrible. And I'm like I said, do you even know what social media is? And she goes, yeah, I wouldn't be able to watch videos. I was like, ok. So she thinks, like YouTube, like that's what she thinks.
Speaker 1:Oh man, ok, I want to close this out with you guys. I, okay, I want to close this out with you guys. I'm curious what advice would you give to your younger self Like, what piece of advice would you give?
Speaker 2:To not worry so much about the future and to not worry so much about the past and just focus on the present moment, because, in the grand scheme of things, life is short and just to really really enjoy life, like truly enjoy life.
Speaker 2:I feel like that's really what I continually tell myself that all the time that I've gone through so much and I know Lauren's gone through so much, gone through so many things where I've lost friends, where I have lost family members by death, where I just grew up in a crazy household when I was younger and a lot of the times we focus so much on what is going on in the past or the present to try to control and change our future, our direction, that we forget and we worry so much that we forget about what we're actually experiencing life right this minute. I'm such a believer and a dreamer and a doer and I am such a person who I love life so much, like love life so much that I just want to experience it all all the time and just be super happy all the time which, again, is not always going to happen. We're going to have angry moments, but just to not worry so much, it's not, it's not worth it.
Speaker 3:That was exactly what I was going to say. I was actually worried. It's not, it's not worth it. That was exactly what I was gonna say. I was actually worry. I I'm a big worrier and I couldn't tell you how many times my dad would like quote scripture to me when I was younger because I would get so worried about my grade and like school and just like a lot of things mainly school and grades and stuff when I was younger. So it might to tell my younger self not to worry so much, that life is going to be great and that you know, working hard pays off and things like that. But like not to let it get to me because I do feel like worrying and anxiety has been a big reason why I've had health issues and I maybe could have avoided some of those things if I hadn't worried so much about what, about what's going on, because I still worry.
Speaker 3:I'm a mom and a wife and I still have a lot of doubts and concerns about the way you know life is going or what you know. What if this happens, or what if that happens? And so I just, if I can, minimalize the amount of worry and just be enjoying life because life is really short and I don't want to take, I don't want to wish it all away by just worrying so much and just wanting to get through something and also travel more.
Speaker 2:Sometimes we get so much like in our bubble that we just don't want to explore. And I'm huge into traveling and a lot of people you know, like I've had people say well, how can you afford travel? Like I don't have money? I'm like, well, at the time, like years ago, we didn't have money either and we still made it work. We always plan, we always are saving for a year in advance to go on a trip and to take the trip and to experience. I feel like experiences are so important, just like what Lauren said about her kids this morning. She let them that's an experience. That is doing, I feel like experiences Do?
Speaker 2:I love material things 100%. There's a good balance of that but I also love experiences so much more. There's so many more memories that you can create and have and just continuing to create memories and I feel like experiences are going to always win. Your heart's just going to be happy. We crave human interaction, we crave having fun, we crave adventure at some sort of aspect, and I think it's so super important to be able to take advantage of that instead of just being in our own bubble. Take challenges, do something that's scary you know what I mean. Like, don't just sit and wait and wish at things. Do the thing and say yes to yourself and take a chance on yourself.
Speaker 1:I always. I love when people give like these little rants of advice because I just am like, there's the social media tag. Well, I love talking to both of you so much. Is there anything y'all want to say in closing? Anything exciting you have coming up, anything people can watch out for on y'all's socials you never know what you're gonna see.
Speaker 3:Or right here we will go a couple weeks sometimes without content, so we have to batch things in advance and it always just really relatable things that people can relate to, and then it draws people in and then they have. Then they can see the real s in our stories too you know, on instagram and see how you know, just like we're just two moms trying to like make a living and do this thing of life and like it's fun, I would agree, I think, even if people aren't moms y'all's content.
Speaker 1:I mean a lot of the stuff that drew me in with you guys. One of the how I connected with y'all was I posted one of y'all's videos about.
Speaker 3:It was my video. Yeah, it was the one of us in the car. Yeah, where we, yeah, that's the one that, like for me, had been the best. But yeah, that's when you and I started.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and then you responded to anyway. Yeah, we just started talking, so yeah. And I am not a mom and I love y'all's content.
Speaker 1:Anyway, yeah, we just started talking, so and I am not a mom and I love y'all's content, so thank you, thanks for having me. Yeah, everyone, thank you so much for listening. If you could just rate review the podcast, of course I'll tag Lauren and Steph when I post this. If you guys will give them a follow too and help support them, do what they're doing, support me, do what I'm doing. We really appreciate it.